“ Your personal boundaries protect the inner core of your identity and your right to choices” – Gerard Manley Hopkins

In November last year, I experienced a different level of inner-peace and I had moments where I felt I was glowing. This was mainly because I stopped trying so hard to please everyone and I began to distance myself from everything that was hurting me. I took some dramatic steps like asking my friend to change my instagram password so I won’t have access to it and would avoid certain triggers. It worked! I was happier, less stressed and finally able to focus on what was important to me.

During this period, I picked up new habits that made me more productive and even when I got my IG password back, I made sure to mute content from anyone that I felt negatively affected my mood or happiness.

Here’s what I learnt:
Understanding the importance of protecting what you allow into your life is key. Of course, certain things are unavoidable but most things are in fact avoidable. We can choose the kind of shows to watch, the kind of books to read, the text messages we respond to and the phone calls we pick up. Even in these extremely unique times, we can choose to filter the information we let into our minds.

I would love to recommend two practical steps I believe would be great to practice during this quarantine. With so much spare time, its important to grow in your individuality and develop a deeper understanding of self.

First identify and possibly write out your triggers. (Yes, even the little things that you might deem irrelevant should be included). Be still and think about the things that affect your mood negatively or demotivate you, its important to note where most of your stress stems from.

Secondly, take action! If it might be too drastic to block an account, then mute or restrict access to them. You can simply unfollow if you’re feeling a little bolder. Speak up and say NO to the things that make you uncomfortable and remember that you don’t have to give explanations to justify your happiness, respond to unwanted calls with text messages and inform the person on how best you’d prefer to communicate.
We all have different coping mechanisms, but prioritize discovering what works best for you and do just that.

Always remember, we engage with others better when we have taken care of ourselves first. I hope you’re staying safe and doing your best to stay afloat in these ‘Rona’ times.

Have a lovely week my darlings, please subscribe and show love and support to the blog!

Reminding Yourself

Reminding Yourself

I started overthinking again and comparing my life to others a couple of weeks ago and while I was in that funk, i decided to go back to my old blog posts and re-read them just for fun. I want to share with you what I realized.

I discovered that sometimes we need to be reminded of things we already know but have forgotten to live out or practice.

I have written quite a number of blog posts on a wide range of topics and you would think that surely I possess the answers to life’s most pressing issues and that my life is somewhat picture-perfect because there’s a lot of useful information right here on my blog but that is not the case.

I’m quite certain that I am the antagonist in someone else’s story and this feeling stems from my constant indecisiveness which often leads to making certain decisions that affect those I love.
Truth is, there are aspects of my life where I’m very vulnerable and I struggle to take my own advice because most times I don’t even remember some of the things I know to be true.

It’s important to search your heart, review and reflect on the things you’ve once learnt about an issue before you make a decision or allow a particular emotion consume you.
Here’s a list of three things i would recommend you try:

1) Pause: Thankfully, we are all currently on some form of quarantine or self isolation due to COVID-19 so this is the perfect time to pause and take deep breaths. Go for a walk if it’s allowed where you live and practice conscious breathing. Remind yourself of who you are and who you’re trying to be. Try and ground yourself and be aware of your body’s movements and your surroundings.

2) Review and Reflect : Allow your mind wander back to things you have once read that inspired you and align with your beliefs, remind yourself of what you want. Seek out some of those articles or quotes you know and reread them till you begin to feel uplifted. Personally, I usually come back to read my own blog posts or I go into the scriptures to take God’s own advice.

3) Remind: Remind yourself of who you are and where you want to be and let your decisions be a reflection of that.

Its not the easiest thing to remember every time but I hope it helps you when you find yourself in a sticky situation.

Please don’t forget to Stay Safe in these tough times, pray for those affected around the world and remember to keep your head afloat.