Negative thoughts are not limited to self depreciation or a feeling of inadequacy stemming from work or school, it could be a disappointing situation that happened in the past that you can’t change or an unkind statement that was said about you that you can’t seem to shake off. These thoughts tend to overwhelm us and eventually become a dark cloud over our lives if we feed them and let them grow for too long.
We begin to have random mood swings and periods of anxiety and prolonged sadness.
Here’s what i have learnt from careful observation for a while now, i realize that the more you make a conscious effort not to think about something, your mind ends up going back to that exact thought and you create an endless loop. Its not just enough to say i am going to stop thinking about ‘topic A’ , you’re going to need to actively replace it with ’Topic B’ in order to move on.
Personally, the last few months were really emotionally tasking for me because there was always this constant battle of having to remind myself of my self-worth and trying to deal with problems I knew i had little or no control over. This struggle was frustrating but that period helped me learn 3 major things to practice when dealing with the rampant thoughts in my head
Firstly, NOTICE your negative or unhelpful thoughts. Outline them and take notes of the scenes that you keep playing in your head and be aware of the pattern of thought that constantly builds itself.
What you are saying to yourself?
What words do you use to describe yourself?
What situations trigger you the most?
What fears are constantly living in your mind?
Secondly, REJECT unhelpful or negative thoughts. This is being self-aware and realizing that you have control and power over your mind. You have been given the ability to stop and refuse these thoughts and patterns so use that power. Reject any person or situations that lies about who you are and the potential you carry. Stop people from projecting negative words over your life. Also, avoid any situation that makes you feel worried afraid or hopeless.
Lastly, REPLACE those negative patterns of thinking with positive ones. Feed yourself with only honest and true facts. If you feel that you are always making mistakes, remind yourself of the fact that you are human and not perfect but however if you keep at it you will eventually succeed.
Be honest but be gentle, allow yourself space to grow and heal. Congratulate yourself for the little wins.
These three things have really helped me with my thinking process and made me less stressed and worried. Sometimes share with a trusted friend or a close companion and ask them to remind you of the things they love about you the most. Be reminded of your strengths and wins.
And don’t forget, if you ever need someone to listen you can always send an email and i would be sure to respond with love and kindness.
Happy New year and I cant wait to continue to share more with you.